Thursday, December 31, 2009

Day 320

Mom – Day 320

The last day for 2009! This year consisted of a roller coaster of events and emotions. Last year on New Year’s Eve Zach was with his friends, Victoria and my sister were hanging out. Then in April, we all went to San Angelo, Texas to see Zach graduate from AIT and to see Shane. Galen and I went with our two exchange kids, Eline and Julie and then we met up with Victoria and my sister Julie and her kids. We had everything planned! We were going to take Zach to Dallas and take him to Six Flags and a Rodeo. BUT, military style, Zach had to literally run from his graduation and try and make his flight to Ft. Benning. I was sad that we didn’t have the opportunity to vacation together (I miss that) but I knew it wasn’t Zach’s fault. In May/June Zach came to Maine before he would go to ???(we didn’t know if it was going to be Italy, Germany or Ft. Bragg) It was so nice to have the house full of people again. Our host daughter, Mina, from Belgrade Serbia, came to visit her American family – the Dalrymples. What a wonderful time. Like military style, Zach finally found out he was headed to Germany and his stuff was in Italy. In the summer, I sent my daughter to Europe and she met up with Zach. Zach went with Victoria to Vienna to visit family and then Eline went to visit Zach. I was again happy that my kids were connecting with family and friends. ------ Okay, I am not sure if you followed everything and it is okay if you didn’t but I feel that I have to reflect on the year ---- Then came November and Zach came to visit us again because he was getting ready to deploy to Afghanistan. I remember I was so happy to see him and every time he wasn’t home or in another room I cried. I felt like a junky, trying to find a spot or a moment to cry – someplace where no one would see me. Finally, we planned an early Thanksgiving and Zach came home late. He thought I was mad at him, which I wasn’t, and then all of a sudden everything came out at the table. We were all hurting and it was time that we had to admit it. We all yelled and we all cried. We were all afraid. At the time I was so upset that we were spending precious time upset at one another but now looking back, it was good that we had that opportunity. The day at the terminal, I remember that I didn’t want to let him go board the plane. I knew that would be the last time I would see my little boy, I knew that the next time I would see him he would be different.

My life now is so much my son. I know that my son made the decision to join the military, but in truth we all did to some extent.

Happy New Year Zach, I love you – Be Safe

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